So I don't know how many of you out there read the gossip blogs or the hip-hop blogs but I peruse them
Nowadays there's this new groupie chick out named Kat Stacks. She's the exact opposite of superhead. Yet i find her to be so fascinating. She's right up there with my interest in the perpetual baby mommas. So I decided to interview her for my blog. She was kind enough to grant me an interview. Check it out below:
J-Full: Hello, Kat Stacks, how are you this evening?
Kat Stacks: It's Kat Stacks biiiiiiitch!
JF: (frowns visibly) So I hear you're in town (she thinks i live in Atlanta full-time) hosting a party, could you tell the readers a little more about it.
KS: Yea...um basically niggas be blowing up my manager tryna get me to come out and what not tryna blow they spot up. Make it poppin
JF: (Ignores the fact that she has a "manager" muthaf*cka for what?!?! ) Speaking of making shit poppin, there are those that say rappers use you for publicity
KS: I don't give a fuck! I'M KAT STACKS BEEEIIIITCH these niggas fly me in town tryna fuck. They know ima put they shit on blast but they still fall asleep around me! So maybe they using me but i'm using them!
JF: well while we're adressing rumors, what's the deal with you and soulja boy?
KS: He's a cokehead yo!
JF: Did you do cocaine with him?
KS: He's a cokehead!
JF: That wasn't the question...
KS: (visibly confused) Can you repeat that?
JF: Nevermind moving right along. Why are you on twitter tryna to bone Carmelo, don't you know he's married?
KS: That nigga was blowing up my DM tryna get me fuck him!
JF: but he said he'd pay $5k to whoever slaps the shit outta you. I think he was being literal...
KS: what dat mean! I dropped outta high school beeeeitch! Anyway he ain't say that shit he got hacked!
JF: I heard you were gonna file a lawsuit. Who are your lawyers?
KS: Some folks I seent on a commercial during Maury!
JF: Speaking of Maury, I heard you have a 9 month old baby, who's the father?
KS: Sheeeit I don't know. I be gettin it IN. (cackles)
JF: Alright...moving right along...let's play a little word association
JF: basically I'm going to say a phrase and you tell me the first thought that comes to your mind? ready
KS: She a hoe!
JF: Hotdog in a hallway
KS: My pussy beeeitch (cackles)!
JF: A possum
KS: Kat STACKS BEEEEITCH!
JF: Lastly, I wanted to ask your feelings on Superhead. Are you jealous of the success she's achieved, while you're out suckin and fuckin low budget rappers?
KS: Nigga i'm internashunul!
JF: So what do you want to gain outta all this? What's the point of "exposing" all these celebrities nobody gives a shit about anyway?
KS: They just be making me mad so i get them back.
JF: What do they do?
KS: Ignore my calls and texts
JF: But you're a groupie hoe! not to mention you ain't even tight!
KS: I'M NOT A HOE!
JF: you just put out a video saying Jim Jones paid $800 dollars to smash!!! That ain't even got no commas in it. Not to mention he's a dirty nigga. You basically fucked a homeless man for 800 bucks. (clearly getting dumber by the moment)
KS: That don't make me a hoe!
JF: but you fucking for money and fame. At least Montana Fishburne's limited edition cheetah print ass cheeks got $50k outta the deal. What do you have to show for it?
KS: Listen nigga I don't need this shit! I'm KAT STACKS BEEEITCH (Storms off)
Clearly this was a fake interview. But all jokes aside this woman needs help. The sad thing is there's somebody's daughter out there that looks up to her. I was on her site (had the antivirus on extra alert, wasn't tryna get computer AIDS) and it seems as if she's gloating about having mental health issues and attempting suicide. The sad thing is that I don't think she even thinks her lifestyle is a mental health issue in and of itself. I don't condone violence against women and she was already assaulted on video by some goons of BowWow. So now she's taking a stand against violence against women. That's noble of her I guess. My guess is she doesn't see the violence she's committing against her own body, but whatever. According to twitter she's filing a police report against Carmelo Anthony. So we'll see how that stuff turns out. If groupie possums are you thing you can check her out on Twitter at @ihatekatstacks or on her site Kat-stacks.net If you're against dating violence check out DoSomething.org Unfortunately I don't know any site for interventions for aspiring celebutantes/groupies/hoefessionals but if I stumble upon something I'll be sure to let yall know.